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You steep yourself in joy

The moments warmly melt together

Until your smile clicks into automode

And you realize there’s only so much of another’s joy you can handle when you are hurting inside.

Their joy gushes forth and

envelopes your willing heart

but it makes the sinkhole larger…

It makes the hole gnaw away faster

making its gaping maw even larger

you helplessly taste the bitter tinge of woe mix with the sweetness of the time

Your conscience flails in the viscose goo of regret…

And you steel yourself against the tears that prick you with insistence

Because it horrifies you that

you could ever besmirch their rightful joy.

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