It’s not you really
It was my first rendezvous
I have seen desire
I have felt wanted in the heat of the moment
As the prize that awaits to be taken
I have seen it spark and dull as soon as it is satitated
But you were lost… And let me find myself in you…
It was your softest touches
That made me ache for your warmth
But you too could only be fleeting…
You who saw something real and ran back to your demons
Their harm was more familiar than my hope.
I feel cheated… This will never be what i deserve.
It will never be what i am due.
I don’t want to be an outlier.
I want to be the cliche that brings such relief.
To all optimists and well-wishers
I too want to believe their words
I too want to bury my wariness
Before it consumes me whole
Before it hardens what beats.