Outlier

It’s not you really

It was my first rendezvous

With emotion

With potential

I have seen desire

I have felt wanted in the heat of the moment

As the prize that awaits to be taken

I have seen it spark and dull as soon as it is satitated

But you were lost… And let me find myself in you…

It was your softest touches

That made me ache for your warmth

But you too could only be fleeting…

You who saw something real and ran back to your demons

Their harm was more familiar than my hope.

I feel cheated… This will never be what i deserve.

It will never be what i am due.

I don’t want to be an outlier.

I want to be the cliche that brings such relief.

To all optimists and well-wishers

I too want to believe their words

I too want to bury my wariness

Before it consumes me whole

Before it hardens what beats.

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