I left before he needed to push away my hand clasping his tightly…
Knowing all the while that he could forget all that i would always remember…
Knowing i will regret not seeing through what he easily leaves behind…
I look back but see my shadow lingering…
Waiting for a chance that will never come.
A wanderer met a healer
They felt their spark at once
And yet the healer’s glow hurt the wanderer’s eyes…
And the healer foresaw the circuitous journey of the wanderer…
And so the healer looked on hope
Yet the wanderer sought to wander once again.
He kissed her hand and wished her well…
“Maybe I’ll be back some day…”
And for once the healer felt the gaping wounds she always sought to heal.
What pulls me closer to you
When you have decided to pull away?
It’s because we both feel
What you are willing to lose
And I’m willing to be lost in.
I’m sorry I think I asked for you…
As broken and weary and lost as you are
I think I still asked for you.
I asked to feel what i have never felt before
And you crossed my path and lingered long enough for me to know what that is.
And while I can feel all this pain of letting you go… I know I am stronger and staying with you will only make you feel more than I ever could.
Hurt you more than I have ever hurt myself… And so I let you go even though you made me feel… And it felt so good to actually feel.
So close and yet we are so far
Will we end up stronger
Or only find strength in tearing each other apart?
Do we stay to find out or do we part ways while we still can
And yet the regret and pain is overwhelming even now…
Those who uplift us
Will not always stay by your side
They will find who they belong to
However much you long.
At a crossroads
Where still you hold my hand
Because I’ve asked so little
And given so much…
And yet I do not want to pull you along
Because i know you’d let go
The moment i asked for more than this.
And with your one short sentence
I realized.
Here I was again with
Another one
Who didn’t think I was
Worth his heart.
My vulnerability, it lies naked in my verse and though my heart at times seems not to share as openly or soar. Its heady days of climbing those dizzying heights seem but a faded fragment of naivete… I seem to have found the courage to live in the moment and not be as wary of where it all may lead… Because even as my vulnerability stands bare… It no longer needs to feel ashamed.
“You can’t love someone into loving you”
And yet I cannot help but try…
I wish I could lock my heart up as tight as you do yours…
But I can’t
So I have less of it each time.
