I wonder if kindness scares you?
Do you feel undeserving of its touch?
Or do you feel it a burden to live up to?
Tag Archives: ego
odd leveler
why do i sigh (a little relieved)
when fear comes tumbling out of your mouth
your urgent words collide into each other
in their haste to express what i hardly have the courage to sum up
and therefore reply with silence
(and a deeply quiet marvel)
at how insecurity is such an odd leveler
an overlooked equaler
Found out…
I have been found out…
pathetic there i stand too defeated to even try to remember
how upright i stood.
How every one of your innocent encouragements were in vain
nothing was to match my ego
revelling in all its undeserved glory.
The extent of your pity stings me, needles me, rips me apart
how cruel that this pain is not rescuingly fatal
it stays so that i must endure your forced praise.
Every bit of expectation and attention
that which let me gloat
and simper in all smugness
now causes to wrench slowly the very heart that burst with pride.
Your eyes too deep they are
they see too much in me…
i cannot stand how they enter and see
yet fail to acknowledge
but acknowledged it stays
within the very wavering of your glance
The very silence that falls when you ask and i stay soundless
soundless so that you may hear the screams of humiliation that rack me within
as you continue to wipe away tears that i cannot touch
let its vain salt burn the very face that is unable to utter Truth.
intotheindigo 