Waiting to know

I write mindlessly
Not knowing what i want to mean
Not knowing what I’m supposed to want
I reach out to no one
And feel no one needing me
But that’s not true
Everyone needs to not hear
Me out of chorus
Out of tune
Out of order
Out of sense
And searching for my own understanding
Because no one knows how long that could take
And who but i…if even i come to know…
Know what i really need to know?

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Belonging

i have simply become accustomed

to needing what has been named and deemed mine

though all that is mine

is no more mine

than i am

to me

nor how much i

am more yours

than we

and still i know

i am lighter and freer

without such much any

i cannot but yearn

to belong.

ready

i’m ready to lose you

ready to leave and

even if you disagree

and we can be as we

always were before

i’m ready to go

because

now

i’m ready

to be free.