unwishing

if i dont want it too much

will it become within reach?

if i don’t hope it will come true

does it not have a better chance of becoming real?

if i always look for a way to survive

then cannot i not share it with another?

if i accept that i will never be happy

then surely i can hope that my few moments not to be snatched away?

the past has passed

i know you search me with your eyes

and wonder why my love waxes and wanes

why i accept your love with a haunted wounded wavering

…the past has passed and the scars have all but healed…

…the past has passed and its lessons learned…

…the past has passed and all those who did not stay are not missed…

and yet i and my soul remain in the clutches of its grasp….

the now

looking towards the Future

only takes you so far

when you are waiting

for the Now to appear.

and though all that is optimistic

claims to follow Yet

and all that has gone

has been washed over with

Yesterday’s rosy brush

the Truth is:

Now with its

imperfections

and awkwardness

is what i impatiently

crave.