When did he think
he was possible?
why did he
twitch at
the ray of light?
why did he blink
to the sound of voices?
how will he cry out
where no mercy dares echo?
who taught him to believe in Life
when he was not wanted?
Who will tell him as he awaits to breathe?
Renewed from 2012
unfolding flower
with what hope
will you be born with?
with what dreams
will you be enthralled with?
with what desires
will you be allured with?
with what sorrows
will you be shrouded with?
where will you face
to seek the sunlight?
where will you turn
to weep with the rain?
where will your seedlings
fly?
where will your petals
fall?
2012
let me live my life as a leaf.
let me lift and leave as they do.
they beg not to let go of limb…
but they go nevertheless, their greeness outgrown.
their brightness only crumbling to rustling brown bits
as i watch whether trampler will rake them back to me…
they do not stay as i do.
i alone cannot bear for each of them to go.
leaving me so bare and barren once more.
let eternal winter slay me through once.
lashes no more, no one hears my white muffled cries.
crack me in two and be done with your icy touch.
let not Spring come again with her adornments,
they mean nothing to me no more.
Sultry Summer with her,
blush of petit sweet offerings.
my bitterness ever taints them…
carressing eyes yet shriveling tongues.
etch not your beloveds upon me…
i promise your parting,
under my very boughs.
Once there was an If
That wanted to meet a Then
But didn’t know when
And after many nots, no’s, and simply cant’s
If struggled to have anymore
Wait for Then
Because If and only If
Knew that Then
Would be how
If became within Life
But the more If
Encountered Else
If realised there’s still Life
Waiting for Then or not.
Society says I only have so much time
Biology sagely agrees
But Life
And Will
And Experience
They keep asking me to wait
For better.
And I?
I seesaw between hope and despair
I venture and retreat
I try and falter
And still try
I will do what i can
Until i can’t no more.
Will anyone in your eulogy
Ever mention the regrets you died with?
Ever reveal the secrets that haunted you?
Ever pity the mistakes you made?
Ever wish you were better?
Ever comment how much time you wasted wishing you were as perfect as your eulogy would be?
*****************************************
A response poem by asoulwalker
When I die Tell them I was flawed And they can do better And I should have. When I die, Tell them I had dreams But often times Was far too broken to try. When I die, Tell them I mattered But they mattered more And they need to love each other. -a soul walker https://asoulswalk.wordpress.com/
When you’re in pain
It’s hard not to think of an end
It’s hard not to think of an off
But to do so is human
Yet seeing it through is not a really a fair choice
So much fear, so much doubt, so much so to think of just getting an out..
If it were… though… how many of us would stay the course?
How many of us stay to see a little more with a little less each time?
How am i strong
When I’m still submitting to weaknesses?
Brushing away the nagging feeling
That things are not alright
That they can be better
But it’s in my hands.
How am I stronger
When I still am not able
To make the right
And cut my losses
To shape my life
The way it should be?
The way i so want it to be…
The ants continue to swarm
colluding, confiding
in whatever it is that’s rotting.
Something still awaits to
announce itself
its stench is lost to me.
Do they know of their doom?
of the broom that looms?
their scattered demise in one fall swoop?
A fatal brush,
A bristled death.
I look away
let them crawl away
let their beady bodies
cluster in writhing clues.
intotheindigo 