However way i say it
It sounds presumptious
a burdensome burden
All the praise
All the stifling pity
The not so quiet questioning
Sweet, kind, cheerful, helpful, loving
What are we missing?
What are we not seeing?
What a sad fate
Tsk tsk tsk.
a plea for pity
a soothing reprieve
a willingly wept prayer
a wretch’s last unsubtle cry for mercy
hopeless words half said, half breathed
a beckoning death knell
could not sound sweeter
and yet fate would not allow such ease
a desperate wail
scraped from within
feeble efforts to meekly appease
the undeniable truth of unease
is Normalcy just Numbness?
Only Pain can tell:
“Invisible yet instrumental in releasing sense obnoxious/Heart throbbing realized as it echoes through one’s stuffed head/Interest feigned only when ache tramples throughout the body”
How pill pleases those who are ill!
(Never mind the effects that do not take a side)
- placed, wetted, diluted, mixed
- pushed, forced, gagged,
- sucked, sunk, drowned, disintegrated
- to Numb.
To return one to the Norm,
undefined yet deified
when all that one can do
is pathetically yearn
for wholeness, trueness, fullness
of blissful Numbness…
- Swimming colours interrupt solemnity
- Pulsing sounds deter away from fruitful thought
- Self pity wails away: “Oh woe is me!”
“If only I were well:”
- and a thousand new oaths follow…
- such copiously sanitary resolutions
- such strenuously optimistic inclinations
All in order to bargain for another day of being well…
all is forgotten when one is well once more…
When one is one and Numb once more.
i carry rocks in my pockets
each a shameful badge
of a lost war
the sea beckons and pushes back
pushes me back
it gives me a last chance
to turn back…
before it embraces me to its liquid core.